I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
