I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
