is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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