where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
