peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Randomize
