She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
