your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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