Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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