I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize