Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
