Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
we're so committed to being not committed
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize