I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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