where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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