My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
