belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
your room smells of hookers.
And success
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
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