After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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