I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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