Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize