I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Why is your signature on my underwear?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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