I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
My feet surprised me
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