You were right. It hurts to walk today.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
