It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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