he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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