how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
