Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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