we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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