You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
