he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
