Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
