what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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