All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Randomize
