wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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