I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
