Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
