and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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