thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
