I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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