I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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