How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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