I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
