Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Randomize
