ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
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