I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I DEMAND FORESKIN
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
