Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
