How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
