you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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