fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
