If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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