True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
