When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
