I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
